I clicked a banner here on DiaryLand a few minutes ago. It led me to a diary whose introduction page piqued my interest...because it was a mirror image of mine! Some of my random facts this hoodlum copied verbatim, and some he slightly altered to reflect his own views. My diary is not your personal cookie jar! You can't sneak shit out of it!

Our first lines are exactly the same:

[My last introduction page was totally out of date, so I decided to erase it and start a new one.]

My introductory statement:

Hello, I'm Pancake and here are some random facts that really won't help you get to know me at all.

His introductory statement:

Hello, I'm Robert and here are some random facts that really won't help you get to know me at all.

My third fact:

3. I'm neither a morning person nor a caffeine person. It's really a bad combination.

His third fact:

3. I'm neither a morning person nor a night person. It's really a bad combination.

I was going to point out every similarity, but it's literally the entire thing! He even copied my numbering mistakes on facts 7 and 8! It gets worse. I've seen his template before on a design website. (I don't remember which.) He removed the credit link!

Flood this dirty pilfering bastard with scathing notes until he confesses, apologizes, and licks my dogs' feet!