Dear Jow*,

When I met you at the party on Saturday, all I really wanted was a good hard fuck. You were cute, you were funny, you were nice, you made me very wet drinks, and you made me very wet, just by being yourself. You seemed like the only candidate, really. I know you were aware of the fact that I only wanted sex, because at one point, you asked if I was trying to take you home. "No," I replied. "I'm trying to get you to take me home!" That's as bold as I could get, short of pouncing on you in front of everyone, which I would never do. You already know what happened, Jow*, so I guess I don't have to remind you, but I will anyway. You got girly on me and turned me down. Afterwards however, you did hold my hand, tell me I'm pretty, suggest we kiss (which I refused; it's either all or nothing), make an excuse to touch my leg, pet my face, and touch my hair. Oh yeah, you also touched my toenail, and that was kind of weird and random, but I forgive you. This was all very nice (except the toenail part), but it wasn't sex.

Despite the weird toenail thing, I liked you even more after you got all sentimental on me. You further melted my icy little heart when you called me the very next day. Then you called again today, and we met at Starbucks and walked around town. I noticed that anytime you mentioned a friend, you said I would probably meet them soon. That leads me to this question... Do you want sex? Or do you want a relationship and sex? I'm fine with either one, really. I like you, and I won't mind if this progresses to a quasi-romantic relationship, but be warned. If you just want sex, stop trying to get to know me immediately! Because the longer we hang out without having sex, the more I'll get to know you. The more I get to know you, the more my girly emotions will come into play. Before you know it, I'll want much more than sex! I'll want good restaurants, presents, and "I love you"s. I shudder at the thought.

Love (maybe),
Pancake

*Not his actual name. Thanks to Evangeline for making up the alias "Jow". She meant to type Joe, but we'll all forgive her, won't we?