Mmm. I love being an asshole. Blackmail? Love it!

That has nothing to do with the following entries.

I was just looking through my purse, trying to find some unused entries. See, I always write them down on paper when I'm bored, then later I simply type them up and edit them. Let's see... Have I mentioned the benefits of attending highschool yet? If I have, ignore this:

There's one benefit to attending highschool: Free school supplies! From whom, you may ask? My unorganized peers! They're constantly losing pens pencils, markers, highlighters, chewed gum around! You know what they say, "finders keepers, losers weepers."

How about this one?:

Picture this: It's Saturday morning and I've just awoken. Still laying down, I wrap my legs around the back of the sofa. Disoriented, I make a futile attempt to move my arms; They feel paralyzed and heavy with sand. I'm finally able to move an arm just enough to sufficiently scratch my butt. After a few moments of scratching, I notice that the feel of my fingernails is odd: they're even. Looking at my nails, I discover the reason; The nail on my middle finger is gone! ::cue scary music:: This raises several unsettling questions: Where did my nail go? How did it break? Will I get a visit from the Nail Fairy? What should I do with my other, full-length nails? Cut them to match? These are questions no female should ever have to ask. Take care of your nails, ladies, and good luck.